Shock and Pause

Just returning from my birthday vacation where I floated aimlessly in the ocean and watched sunsets, reality set back in pretty quickly. A close friend was faced with the possibility of losing their job, and then just minutes ago a call from another friend, “Sam is in hospice.” Life seemed to creep in to being a bit out of sorts eerily. 

The news of Sam has hit hard; one of the dearest, sweetest men you’d ever meet. He doesn’t have any family close by and dear friends have been in the role of caretakers albeit during his long illness, not consistently still actively involved. Not sure what might come next they reached out, one surely to let me know the news but also looking for help once Sam was home. 

Just after I had gotten home and before all of this, oddly enough I had been thinking about how I kept meaning to update the bag of emergency preparedness I have sitting out and put back in my car, financial and legal documents that have needed to be updated, and then all of the news. 

How many times have all of us said; “I really should do……” and another day passes and then another. My friend has gotten a reprieve, but Sam doesn’t have any time left. The really ‘should do’s’ won’t get done and the I wish I had’s, well they won’t happen either. 

The time I spent aimlessly floating gave me a refreshed perspective about the busy-ness of life and how important the simple moments are. Holding the hand of the one I love without saying a word and letting my mind be still not trying to figure things out. Somewhere out of the blue remembering the softness of my Mom’s hand and how when I could get off the ferries wheel and be with her without an agenda of things to do, the moments so sweet and forever etched in my heart.


What will you do today? How can you find life balance so that the important moments with your loved one forefront? 

  • Make lists of all of the things you need to do and keep it updated. If there is something that pops up, deal with it instead of ‘waiting until later.’

  • Take time to recharge your battery so that when things to come up you have the energy to deal with them; take a walk. Try yoga, breathing exercises or another type of movement practice (they’re all good for your body and your mind). 

Please don’t say “But I don’t have time…” because one day whether it be you not taking the time to care for yourself or your loved one’s condition has taken an unexpected turn for the worse; you really don’t have time. 

Be gentle… you. 



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